Too Much Is Happening!

WOW I cannot believe how time has flown by lately! 
And WOW I can't believe all the things that have been happening!


On a good starting note, I've maintained the weight I've lost, which makes me very happy :D I hope to lose more soon, but I'm not ready yet. It takes sheer will power and hard work to do it and you have to be 100% dedicated or you'll probably fail! So I have to be READY and I'm not quite there yet. I will be very soon, though!


In a little over a month Tyler will be graduating from Advanced Individual Training!!! (AIT). I am SO excited!!!!!!! He was offered to sign up with the Rangers and the Old Guard, too, but passed on the Rangers since neither of us felt it was quite right. I didn't tell him what to do either way, but when we talked about it we both knew already what was right. The Old Guard would be SO awesome since he'd be guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier!!! That would be the most HONORABLE thing to do in the military, in my opinion, but his waist isn't tiny enough and he may be just 1" too short!! lol I love him just the way that he is, but the Army is very strict with how they do EVERYTHING. 


So I leave TOMORROW to fly out to see Tyler!!! I am ECSTATIC!! It's all I can think about!! Of course I get anxiety over my safety getting to and from there, over Tyler being allowed a Pass to spend time with me, over spending money we do not have, over leaving the girls with friends and family and trusting they'll be 100% completely safe, and also anxiety over everything that will be staying at home alone without us to protect it from crappy neighbors, and every other little and big responsibility I have. WOW I feel overwhelmed right now!! (and NO I am not "FRANTIC", as one anonymous person said to me a little while ago. Try walking in my shoes for ONE DAY before passing judgment!). 
Anyway, Tyler and I NEED this time together and we're so excited! I cannot wait! We were hoping to go to Washington D.C. to the Temple and to the Holocaust Museum and the White House, but it's a crazy commute there so I'm not sure if it'll work out or not. I have everything prepared to go there, but we'll see. We may just go to Busch Gardens (for free, thank you to those who honor and respect military families and give awesome discounts!!!) and to the beach or to Williamsburg or whatever. I'll just be happy to BE WITH Tyler!! OF course I'm going to miss my little girlies so very very much, and I know Tyler will hate not having them come with me, but he requested that just I come so we could be alone together for a little bit. Of course he cannot stay in the hotel with me, but I'll be happy with being with him in the daytime :) At least I'm already familiar with the area so I feel comfortable going there alone.


Okay, so we had a recent trauma (well, I did anyway) in the last few days. I couldn't bring myself to write it here since it was so recent, but here's a shorter version of a long, sad story.
My neighbors do not like me because I am LDS. They have told me so. They know where all the LDS people live in our neighborhood/area and have pointed them out and said they "hate" them, no kidding. They don't even know any of us! Anyway, we're friendly and nice but these neighbors are what you call "Jack Mormon's". These people are those who were either offended by other church members or don't like to "be told what to do" (give me a break!!) or think that the Church somehow wronged them or don't like their "rules" and blah blah blah. Pretty much they range anywhere from people who have negative feelings towards the Church and it's members but nothing hostile to completely hostile and do everything they can in their power to try to bring the Church and it's members down. All of these Jack Mormon's were baptized at some point in their life into the Church and didn't get what they thought was owed to them so they left, or they just don't care and like to party instead. This may offend some people to say it, so I'm sorry, just don't be so easily offended ;) lol. 
Anyway, my neighborhood is full of these Jack Mormon's. They all party all night long on most nights, and throw up in my yard, break my kids toys, throw cigarettes at our stuff and into our mail box, tear Military stickers off my car, steal the Military magnets (twice now) from my car, steal my kids toys, and torment and tease and hurt my children. 
Just yesterday one jerk fed my little Sophie chewed on sunflower seed casings telling her they were nuts. How cruel is that? Makes me SO ANGRY! I seriously want to go kick him in the face. Okay, that was probably too much haha, but really, these guys have pushed it over the line.
They've called the cops on me FOUR TIMES now making things up! I'm SICK of it!! DONE with it. Anyway, they look for reasons to cause fights or problems with me. I usually just mind my own business, keep my distance, wave and say hi once in a while just to show I can be nice, and I try to keep my girls from bothering any of them. It's hard work, especially when they make comments about me almost every time I go outside. I just ignore them, though, realizing they're probably drunk or high, or both, and just want to fight.
One neighbor lady actually attacked me. I don't want to get into all the details here since it'll just make this a lot longer than it needs to be, but she wanted a fight and that's all she was interested in. She was extremely offensive and vulgar, contentious, out-of-control, violent, irrational, and PSYCHO!!!!!!! If I didn't have training in martial arts I would've been on my butt the first time she rammed into me with her gargantuan chest. I blocked all her hits and punches and even though she kept ramming me with her gargantuan chest and body, I managed to stay upright and finally just turned around and walked away. Of course I was yelling back at her, just like "You can't talk to me? You have to swear? I'm not hitting you; I don't want to fight" etc etc. It was SOOO LAME. And it scared the crap out of me!!!!
I do NOT respect any woman who tries to act like a manly street bully. sor ry. no way. She acted like she was some huge black man and seriously it was so annoying and offensive. She's a 6 foot plus white woman, about 300+ pounds. TWICE my size!!! Come on..... pick on someone your own size, right? Wrong. She was out of control. 
Anyway, needless to say I do NOT feel safe here!!! I feel like my life is in danger as are my daughters' lives, too. So after the Police came and took contradicting statements from all our druggy neighbors who are her party-pals, and he advised me to move from all these hostile neighbors and situation, I called my mom, the landlord, and the storage unit place and made arrangements to start moving IMMEDIATELY. I am moving to my mom's house. 


I am honestly so overwhelmed right now that I've made myself sick. I've had a fever for days now, stomach aches, headaches, and poor concentration. My hair is falling out, I feel nauseated, my skin has broken out, and I'm so tired I can hardly sleep and having violent and disturbing dreams every night. It seems like to most people my situation is annoying but nothing more than that. One person told me "what you're going through would be so easy for me because I can handle stress really well, but I can see how you would be having a hard time with it because you can't handle very much". OUCH WHAT???? She's NEVER been even close to what I've gone through and am going through. Talk about arrogance! Holy cow!! She's like 10 years younger than me.... she has more to learn. Of course she probably didn't realize she came across so harshly. FAIL. (as Josh would put it LOL).
I have a lot to juggle! And right now at this moment I feel torn apart, torn to go in multiple directions so much that it's causing me confusion and stress beyond words. 


I have to clean my super messy house (my vacuum is broken), pack everything, sort through and organize my stuff, most has to go to storage and some to my parents, I have to do all of this within a few days, clean the place, change my address at a million different places, cancel contracts with different providers, pack my luggage for the trip, pack my girl's luggages for their "trips", and do all of this in 1 1/2 weeks while taking 6 days of that 1 1/2 weeks and being away with Tyler. My landlord expects me to have my entire place moved out of and cleaned spotless in ONE DAY!!!!!!! IMPOSSIBLE!!! I have to find people who can help me because I literally cannot do this alone. It's impossible. Plain and simple. I do not have a truck. I do not have big enough muscles or a strong enough back to lift even my stupid sofa, let alone the other heavy things I have. I do not have enough boxes. I do not have enough time. I do not have enough brain power at the moment to keep it all organized. SHEESH!!! 


Okay, enough complaining. I guess I really felt a need to vent!!! 
I just pray that things fall into place as they should and that things won't turn out as bad as I'm fearing them to!!


I know that the Lord is blessing us and has been. I know that these things will make me stronger, wiser, more experienced. But I tell you what, right now it's so hard that I feel like I cannot see an end in sight. I feel trampled on and torn apart, sick and stretched too thin. 
I don't even know exactly what to pray for!! haha. But at any rate, at least my life isn't boring, right? :D 


PS Thank you to my friends who have come through and helped me! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. I have needed you SO much right now, you were an answer to my prayers!!!!!!! And thank you to my family who have helped me!! Thank you soooooooooooo much!!!


PSS I have left a lot of stuff out that has added to my stress. No need to tell everything that is going on, right? lol

A Mini Update..... he leaves in 13 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I cannot believe how fast time is running by! My Tyler leaves in 13 days!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lacie and Sophie are being prepped by Tyler himself and they are sad. Sophie feels like he's leaving her because she was bad and Lacie's just distraught over the entire thing. She's a daddy's girl through and through and has been since day 1!!
I'm sincerely hoping that I can keep my girls busy and happy and satisfied with life while their daddy is gone.
Remember, he's been with all of us pretty much 24/7 since he lost his job over a year ago!!! This is going to be the exact opposite for us. Here 24/7, then gone 100%.
I have a lot of plans on how to keep us busy and happy and I really hope they can work out!
Money will be EXTREMELY tight but I am praying that creditors and doctors will work with us on payments so that I can afford to get the girls swimming lessons, maybe even dance or martial arts lessons. I think they'd be so happy to do something like that!
I want them to take piano lessons and I'd love to teach them both violin lessons. I'd have to rent the miniature violins, though, and that's 30.00 a month for the both of them. Well, that's what it used to be when I used to teach Lacie.

I have a wonderful ward member who is going to be watching Sophie for me during the day and getting Lacie to and from school. What an answer to prayers she was!!! And she has girls my girls' ages and they're in the same classes and everything. I'm so happy about that!!

I'm still trying to decide on going to school in the Summer. If I do I'll have to find another babysitter. I'd go for only 2 reasons: 1. my own thing away from home to keep myself busy in my own personal endeavors and 2. for the loan money. Yeah the money reason's not the best reason, but that money we could use to pay off a little more immediate and impatient debt and also to use so that we can fly to Tyler's basic training graduation in May or June sometime.

Right now we're trying to cut from our lives those that only have negative things to say and think about us. It's been very hard doing this because, unfortunately, some of them have been family. Here's what I said to one of our cousins last night: "They say that blood is thicker than water. But what if that blood is poisonous? Do you keep the poisonous blood or switch to pure water?" Honestly, what makes more sense? I'm pretty sure the "family" that have been giving us problems won't be reading this anyway, and we both have such huge families that almost none of you can even begin to guess who these people are. But just the same, I won't mention who they are, and it's not just been family. It's been "friends" and acquaintances. It's hurt, but it's been more painful to have these negative, self-righteous and judgmental people in our lives than cutting them out.

Okay, Tyler and I have had a few opportunities to go to the Temple together thanks to my parents!!! My parents are already super busy but they realize the importance for Tyler and I to have these times alone to go to the Temple and on dates and what-not. Also thanks to Michelle!! And to Destiny and sometimes Tyler's parents and other friends and family here and there who have let us leave our girls with them so that we can be together.
We're trying to create more memories to keep with us while we're separated.

Oh, and we got more ammo for both my guns :D hee hee. Cannot ever be too prepared, right?? Tyler wants to make sure I'm 100% set for while he's away and unable to physically protect us. Great thing is that I know we'll be protected. I do wish we lived in a better place, though! The neighborhood has been getting creepier all the time with the families moving out and single partiers moving in!

Okay, now I should get to bed. I have a test coming up, like usual, and we have more organizing, cleaning, errands and other important odds and ends to attend to. If we seem "out of it" or forgetful or untouchable don't think it's cuz we have something against you at all, it's cuz we have a lot going on and we're totally wrapped up in ourselves at the moment and I'm sorry if this hurts anybody! We don't mean it. We just really appreciate your love, understanding, patience and prayers! Keep 'em coming!!