Ugh! I'm so frustrated!!

Ugh! I'm so frustrated! I'm frustrated that we only have ONE set of friends helping us move tomorrow, and I'm so frustrated that we won't have internet until October 8th, and I'm so frustrated that I have to memorize TWO monologues perfectly by Oct 10th, and I'm so frustrated that a best friend of mine's husband is being a piece of shit and being mad at ME for his problems, and I'm so frustrated that people have gossiped about us so now they have totally misconstrued perceptions of us, and I'm so frustrated that we have half the house still to pack and it's almost 12:30 am, and I'm so frustrated that we can't move our stuff right into the new place cuz of possible bugs, and I'm so frustrated that they didn't clean the new place, and I'm so frustrated that the new neighborhood is the ghetto, and I'm so frustrated that I can't even sleep tonight..... I can go on and on and on.... but I'll stop for a minute and take a breather.
ah phew!!
I really hope that Mollee & Tau come tomorrow to hang out with us, unless Tau wants to be like a teenage girl some more and be mad at me for really lame-ass crap that's HIS problems. Of course Mollee is very pregnant and VERY tired and sore. I wish she could just come relax at our place and chill. I need the company!
Most family & friends won't even come over because of the cockroach crap we have to deal with! It's not fair. It's not like they're going to carry any home with them! It's not THAT bad!
I really, really, REALLY, hope we like this new place better! One problem is that the utilities are going to be really high! No A/C and really old heating system. There aren't even any vents in that place! yipes!

Tomorrow we have to pick up the washer & dryer and who knows what else from my grandma's house in Murray, we have to get the couch and filing cabinet and who knows what else from Glenn & Andrea's, (who aren't talking to us right now thanks to my mother's twisted gossip), and we have to leave stuff in our apartment to fumigate and then figure out where we're going to put it for the yard sale we're going to have next week. We have to paint, we have to clean, we have a TON left to pack, we have to de-bug, we have to buy more crap at the store, we have to give my beautiful and perfect washer & dryer to a guy that bought them this week, we have to pay rent soon and it's more than we're paying here which is murder, and we have to unload everything on our front lawn at the new place since we might be carrying bugs with us.
Someone has to stay with our stuff there, someone has to stay here, someone has to watch the girls (thank goodness that's taken care of! My mom & Tyler's mom are taking them THANK YOU).
I'm just incredibly overwhelmed and stressed!!!!!!
I need some strength, hope, encouragement, energy, comfort, & some support! Where is my support & comfort? I guess I'll have to pray for it.
ttfn

I Am So Proud Of Him!!!!!

I am so proud of Tyler!!! He not only got straight A's in his psychology class at school but he got an A on his final, too! AND, today he got promoted to Journeyman and soon will be Project Manager!!!! Yay!!!
He's totally on Cloud 9 right now and has needed this for years & years & years.
He might get his own Gunther's truck in the next few weeks and possibly a raise. I'm so happy for him!!
So tell him congrats when you see him!
I love you Tyler!!!

Packing, Packing, Packing!

So I've been busy packing & packing! It's crazy stuff! Especially since I'm doing it ALL BY MYSELF! Well, cousin Millie came & helped me for a few hours, which was sooo cool, but I had to unpack and repack all the boxes we did cuz I had to line the boxes with plastic bags & put boric acid in them. Ugh! It takes sooooo much longer when having to go through EVERYTHING and line boxes and put poison in!
Last night I dared the under-sink cabinet and found TEN dead roaches! It's a small space for TEN! Yucky yucky yucky!!!!!
I swear I can't wait to be roach-free!
I just pray we don't bring any of these nasties with us! I'm being as careful as I can. There's only one box I forgot to put a bag in but it has poison in it, too.
We plan on doing all our unpacking outside, too. Nothing can be brought into our place! It's crazy and we're going to be dead-tired on Saturday, but it's the only way possible. I just wish we could get more people to help. We've got some men to help move our furniture Saturday morning but nobody else will help with anything else. Typical. I guess I can expect that because the roaches freak people out. I don't blame them, I would be freaked out, too!

So I have a BIG audition coming up! It's for LDS Motion Pictures in Provo at their main studio. It's for the year. Last year I totally blew it and sucked big-time, but this year I was given permission to come back but for more important roles than before. Anyway, I have to have two monologues memorized under 1 minute each and be ready for a cold-read. The cold read isn't too bad but I'm sooo nervous about memorizing monologues! I suck at memorization! And I don't have any monologues ready. Yipes! I'm hoping my cousin Carrie Colton will be able to get me some good ones that will be easy for me to memorize.
If there are any hints out there for memorizing monologues then pleeeease let me know! I need all the help I can get! Anyway, I'm excited nonetheless. It's an audition for the entire year and I really hope I do well enough to get a part or more this coming year.

Tyler's last day of school is today!! yea!!!! Well, it's the last day for his first class. LOL. They're having a party and he's not going to the party. He's only going for the final then coming home. After that we'll get to go to Outback Steakhouse!!! We love that place! We get to go ONLY because we have 3 gift cards from Tyler's boss to me for helping with the company party last year to use there. So yeah, yummy! I can't wait!

Oh, and I want to start a vegetable diet. Is that crazy? It's only for a couple weeks or 3 or 4 to get me started on losing weight and learning to eat less and better than I do. I just keep gaining and I'm really sick of being a fatty!! I won't NOT eat anything else when a special occassion comes around, just need to learn to control what I eat day to day.

So that's it for now! :)

Moving! AGAIN! And a much needed update!

So, we're moving!! AGAIN!! We moved here only 5 months ago and we're out again! Well, it's getting closer to 6 months, I think.

We finally started to get to know a few people in the ward, too! And the girls do and don't want to move. They WANT to move because we have a major bug problem here and they DON'T want to move cuz they made good friends that are a couple of Mexican girls (illegal aliens, but they're really nice people).

They might be moving back to Mexico soon, but if not they wanted us to let them know of any apartments where we are moving to. I will, for sure, let them know if there are any. Rentals are super hot right now, though. It took us these 5 months to find this place! Everyone does credit checks now and since ours is CRAP we didn't qualify for anything!

The place we're moving to is in Orem, again, and it's a townhome style apartment. I like it a lot and so does Tyler. It has new flooring throughout and has brown wood paneling! lol It's hilarious but we kinda like it. hahaha we're weird!

Tyler is also back in school. YEA!!!!! He's going to Stephen's Henegar in Orem and is doing AWESOMELY AMAZING! All A's so far! I'm sooooo excited for him! Hip hip hooray! He's majoring in something to do with Medical lol. He's taken the complete initiative this time. It's great!

I applied to work at A to Z Building Blocks in AF and I hear tomorrow if I get it or not... sorda. She will schedule an interview with me tomorrow first. So the girls will go there for free for preschool & daycare and I'll work while with them! yea! I hope it works out good. If not I'll look for another daycare/preschool job or a night job. But I HAVE to work. We're just not making it on Tyler's income alone, and my part-time income from acting/modeling. We have way too much debt! It's mostly all medical, then our car, then just loans and a couple credit cards we used to LIVE with.

I am sooo sad! We are selling our washer & dryer! They're SUPER nice and we have LOVED them! Fridgadaire front-load, black. So perfect! We aren't making back all our money, but we're making okay. We'll pay back our parents next week and pay off my credit card, or most of it anyway. We are also selling like everything else! argh. Being poor really blows! We might be selling our table & chairs, too. It's all very hard. But we have to!

Oh, I've been on TV a few times now, and in a few movies, and modeled a few times now. I'm having loads of fun doing that! I make pretty decent money doing that, but the jobs are far between, okay not TOO bad, but not enough. Especially since I'm getting fatter & fatter all the time!! It makes everything harder with weight-gain!

Oh, and my health. I have thyroid disease and had to up the prescription cuz my thyroid was going all bad on me. I also have really bad acid reflux and had to get a higher prescription on that, too. I found out that I do have depression and P.T.S.D. and anxiety and a little bit of paranoia. Nothing, from what the doc can tell, was from what I was born with but I got thanks to my upbringing and some traumatic experiences I've had throughout my lifetime.

Oh, and GoYin? Well, I still stand by that product 100%! Just cannot afford it right now and I seriously HATE making phone calls at all! So we had to pause that. I hope to get back into it someday... but for now I just can't. We have too many other things going on that are more important.

Okay my hands are getting tired from typing. I'm not sure why, but they just are! So cha cha for now! ttyl :)