Just a little insight I had.... okay it's a long one, again.

Now I realize that many of you will not agree with me but here's a little impression I received last night or yesterday or sometime fairly recently.
Perhaps this was just for me, perhaps it was total truth, or whatever, but being that I'm in no place to receive revelation for anybody outside my own little family I don't expect anybody to accept this so you don't need to argue with me about it or put me down or "put me in my place". You can share with me how you agree or not but it won't change the impressions I received that I know came from my loving Heavenly Father to me directly.

When thinking about the financial differences and material blessing differences between people that have more v people who have less I found myself seriously and sincerely pondering on this. I prayed for some, well, answer I guess.
I had been reading from the scriptures, reading from Sheri Dew's book No Doubt About It, and considering my family, friends and ourselves in this dilemma.

The fact is there are lazy and negative people out there who dwell solely on what they DON'T have and some don't even think about it that much. They just don't think but sit around, waiting to be waited upon.
And there are some who marry and wait on their spouse or still wait on their parents for all their support while still remaining LAZY.

But, there are those of us who are not lazy. We go to school and do the best we can there without dropping out and whining about how hard it is, and those of us who work as hard and best as we can, and those of us who don't have jobs that have labored diligently and faithfully in finding another job without success. And those of us who have physical ailments that prevent us from doing as much as someone who has little or no physical ailments.
I've met so many people the last few years who are very good and faithful, smart and willing people who CANNOT do what others do to be considered successful in this life. I'm positive that these people, as much as those who are happily successful, have as much chance to make it into the Celestial Kingdom as the next obedient person.

Okay, now here's what came to me when thinking about all of this.
"God blesses some to have easier, more successful and enjoyable lives to help make them be happier and more positive people, which help inspire and encourage and give hope to those who struggle through much opposition (lack of money, health, opportunities, support), which then helps them have Faith and continue to have to have hope through all their trials which make them stronger and even more faithful people which then in turn inspires those who are blessed with more to become better people".
Does that make sense?
I had to write it down quickly so as to not forget it.

Pretty much, if people are righteous and follow the Commandments of God and keep their Covenants made with God and each other, then this plan is PERFECT.

God blesses some with great success as a result to their hard labors, heavy studying, and struggles in life.
God also keeps great success from others who struggle and study just as much as those who do receive great success.
This doesn't mean anything, except that we all have different callings and missions and expectations in life.

Remember the scripture that's in the New Testament that says it's easier for a rich man to enter through the eye of a pin that it is for him to enter the Kingdom of God? Why does God say that anyway?
Well, think about it.
If a man/woman gets success for their labors (or even just an inheritance) it can easily get to their heads. "I earned it" "I worked for it" "I deserve it" "It's mine".
The FACT is that ALL THAT WE HAVE IS GOD'S, NOT OURS.
He chooses who gets what in this life, period. It has NOTHING to do with what we do. Sure we can say it does, but think about it. There are some people who do very little and gain a lot. There are some who do a lot but gain very little.
God doesn't reward laziness, Eternally.
Riches and material blessings are not Eternal. They are extremely mortal. Just because someone is hard working and smart with their money doesn't mean that they're Eternally rich. God can give them lots of material wealth but does that go with them into the next life? Do those riches even matter?
NO. Obviously no.

God gives us more things to see what we choose to do with them.
Where much is given much is required.

I'm rambling on a lot more than what I intended, and I'm 100% sure that most who read this will not agree with me. But that's okay. This is something I felt the Spirit taught me personally and I felt like sharing it, for whatever good it could possibly do.

Here's a good example of personally seeing this in my life:
My dad is a very smart man. Perhaps one of the smartest people I've ever met. He's educated, qualified, hard-working, wise, and righteous.
Is he rich? No. He doesn't even have a job. Is it because he's been foolish? NO! Is it because he's been disobedient? NO. Is it because "he's missing something"? NO!
I am getting SICK AND TIRED of hearing people judge my father for his lack of material success in this life. Sick of it.
He's worked just as hard and as smart as the next rich guy, if not HARDER than.
He is not being punished. He is not missing something. He is not forgetting something that's keeping material blessings from him. It is simply that Heavenly Father doesn't NEED him to be rich. He is keeping my dad close to him because that's where he needs him. When we are struggling and poor we usually are humbled which makes us have more faith and the spirit is stronger in our lives making us more susceptible to receiving specific blessings and revelations and inspirations in our life that we otherwise could not have received had we been greatly materially successful.
One this is for certain. My dad is more charitable than any other rich man I know. He is more humble. He is more understanding. He is less judgmental. More accepting. More teachable. More in a lot of ways than any rich man I know.

Now I do know a lot of rich men that are amazing men (and women). I'm not saying that they can't be just as righteous as my dad is and even better.
The point is, just like the scripture says, it's harder for a rich man to make it into the Celestial Kingdom and not because money is evil. No. It's because being humble and having true charity is that much harder. It really is.

When being blessed with material blessings it's hard to remember those who are struggling. It's hard to think about what others with less could possibly be going through.
Usually what absorbs our minds are "they're not doing this right" or "they're not wise with their money" or "they should've done this instead" etc. As if they know better and think that the poor man is foolish, stupid and unwise or not righteous enough.

So here's my point.

Just because you worked really hard and got lots of money doesn't mean you deserved it, and it doesn't mean it's yours, and it doesn't mean you're better than "so-and-so" that has less than you did.
And just because you have no money or no job doesn't mean that you "deserve" less than the rich one. It doesn't mean God hasn't blessed you and it doesn't mean that you're stupid or "missing something" or foolish.

Just remember that the most important things in life are not the fruits of our physical labors, but the fruits of our Spiritual labors.

The wise man built his house upon the rock is not talking about physical things here. It is completely spiritual.

To God ALL things are Spiritual. We cannot comprehend all that the Lord comprehends.
Where we are faithful the Lord stores up TREASURES IN HEAVEN, NOT ON EARTH.

And I really believe this. I really believe that even if I don't ever "score" where money and material blessings are concerned, that they'll be waiting for me in the next life if I remain faithful and endure to the end. And I also know it has nothing to do with how hard I work or how smart I do things but it has EVERYTHING to do with God's plan and God's will in all things.

So I guess you can go ahead and keep your money since you think YOU earned it and it's YOURS and it's because of everything YOU'VE done. Remember that to think this way is thinking you're as great as if not greater than God, because ALL you have is the Father's, and it has nothing to do with your righteousness or smartness and ALL to do with his Plan and will.
As long as we DO OUR BEST and remain faithful we will be blessed AS THE LORD SEES FIT.

I pray that you ALL can understand what I wrote here.... but I won't count on it.

Oh well :)

Staying Positive

As many of you know, who take the time to actually read my blogs, I have been through a few things the last few years (or pretty much my entire life) that are a bit hard, a bit dragging, and trying, etc., etc.
I know people don't like to hear negativity or pessimism, etc. They also like to say that life is what you make it, or attitude is everything, and much, much more.
Well I can say that they are not wrong. I agree. But, I can also say that no matter what there are some of us that are simply and factually at a better advantage than others are.
Just tonight I was looking through an old friend's pictures on a public profile site and was blown away by all the places she's visited in her lifetime. At first I was happy and enjoying all the pretty pictures and interesting places and things she's done, but as I continued to look through them, seeing more and more, the harder it was to be as happy. Sure I was happy for her!! I would never desire to take that fun and enjoyment out of her life in a million years! But it was hard not to think, or remember, the disappointments in my own life. The dreams I had that have never come to pass, and quite possibly never will in my life.

Tyler and I have always had hopes for a brighter future. We both love the outdoors, traveling, music, and just plain ol' "getting out there". We planned on backpacking together, camping, traveling, owning a home, even if it was a tiny junker of a home, of living life!
The reality is that we have not gone anywhere "fun" or exciting or adventerous, we have not even had the chance to.
Life has thrown many curve balls at us and considering everything that has happened we have come pretty far. At least we think so.

So while we see many around us, literally around us i.e. friends, family, neighbors, etc., getting out and living life and being successful we find ourselves struggling to barely make it from one day to the next and sometimes wonder "why us?" or "why couldn't we do that?" or "why can't we have that?" etc. I mean, really. It's hard to sit in a tiny, old, falling-apart townhome without a decent car and not even being able to afford the basic necessities and while I battle with numerous health problems, family problems, even friend problems, while we watch others around us, happy as can be, living up life, successful, having babies on demand, owning beautiful homes that they can actually buy furniture for, going on vacations and trips and everything else without feeling a little like we're missing out, or like our trials are harder than some others are.

It's hard to stay positive in these situations!
Especially since we know we have been working so hard to get on our feet let alone get ahead in life. Especially since we know we've been faithful, perservering, working hard, studying hard, praying hard.
We haven't been overly stupid or unwise. We haven't done anything WRONG, perse, it's just not been that easy for us.

The other day someone arrogantly said to my husband and unemployed brothers "it'd take me just one day to go out a find a job". He's never been in need of a job, layed off or fired. How does he know?
Then an ignorant and arrogant comment from a meaning-well friend "if you'd just lose your weight all your health problems would go away". HA. I wish! Yep, I sure do.
And another comment from well-meaning people "you must be doing something wrong for nothing to go your way! Maybe you don't have enough faith?"
And another "you're not positive enough. If you want it then believe it and it will happen". HAHA.
Still more "you haven't been wise..." "you (Lisa) should've put Tyler through school with you working" "you didn't try hard enough" "your time will come" and so on and so on.
How do things like these help or encourage us?
They do not!
Then one of the most hurtful comments I got from someone who I used to think the world of "I didn't want to keep you as a friend (on facebook, or anywhere actually) because I knew that all your posts on facebook were so discouraging and it was just too much for me to handle. Maybe when I feel like I can handle it all then we can be friends again". She also had written me that I just wasn't positive enough. Well, I guess I could make my updates say things like "wow the flowers are pretty today" or "I like my shoes, they don't have holes in them" or "I'm glad I didn't die today" etc etc.
Sorry our lives have sucked. It's hard to write anything about our lives when hardly anything positive ever happens.
Of course more positive things have been happening more lately, and we have full faith and hope that things will get better!

Anyway, my point to this blog was that even though it's SO HARD to see everyone else's successes and blessings in open plain view I can at least say that I've kept the faith and that my faith has been made stronger through all of this. And I know what's most important in this life, and for the Eternities, too: family. MY family. And anybody else that feels like being LIKE family to us, too. I'm not talking flesh and blood, because that doesn't count so much. It's the family that you make, the family that choose to make you their family by how they treat you, accept you, forgive you, understand you, love you, help you, encourage you, and have charity for you.
I have the most amazing "family" in many good friends (a few in particular.. you know who you are!!) and my own hubby and daughters and other flesh and blood family who support us in thick and thin.

I can say this much. That I know Heavenly Father must love Tyler and I SO SO VERY MUCH to have put us through so so very much!! Because of what we've been through it's made us stronger in many ways: faith, hope, charity, patience, long-suffering, understanding, and with each other and even most importantly it's made our relationships with God so much more stronger! I've been learning invaluable lessons that I know couldn't have been learned in any other way and for that I'm Eternally grateful to my Father in Heaven for all these blessings (trials) that he's given us.
Yes, it's VERY HARD and yes, sometimes I cry and hurt over things people do and say to us and what we don't have and can't have etc etc., but I trust in God to know that He loves me enough that he wouldn't put me through anything more than I am able to handle and that this is ALL FOR MY GOOD and one day, if not in this life, I will have my blessings that are being laid up store for me in my Father's Kingdom.
This I know is true.

So if you cannot handle hearing about somebody's life that is hard and they talk about it then you're not strong enough to handle me, or life in particular, period. Because if you're one of those "lucky" people who thinks it's been through your own amazing smartness and faith and hard-work that's got you that nice, big house and those amazing vacations and trips, and those nice cars and clothes and furniture, and awesome church callings, then think again, because GOD GAVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU HAVE and He can take it away just like "that". Do not ever allow yourself to think that you "earned" anything you have. Do not ever think that you owe yourself this or that, or that you deserve such-and-such, or that you worked hard for it so that's why you have it. When you think like that you will automatically think you're better than others, maybe not on purpose, but really, if you got all you have by YOUR hard work and then you meet someone like me and Tyler and see what we DON'T have you'll automatically think "they didn't work hard enough" or "they're not ambitious enough" or "they don't have enough faith" or "they aren't smart enough" or "they were unwise in their decisions" etc etc. That's not fair, really. And it's judgmental, really.

But to those of you who do have different blessings than Tyler and I have or that have wonderful material blessings that we do not have and still are our friends and love and accept us, God will bless you for that and for not judging us. And we love you so much and are so grateful for your friendships, be you family or friend!

So, I must be vigilant. I must "keep plugging along", as my Grandma Pearson used to always say in her letters to me while I was on a mission. And with that I will keep my faith, striving to be positive and count my blessings among all the chaos and trials and sorrows, cuz really, what else can I do but that? I can accept nothing less from myself.

I Am So Proud Of Him!!!!!

I am so proud of Tyler!!! He not only got straight A's in his psychology class at school but he got an A on his final, too! AND, today he got promoted to Journeyman and soon will be Project Manager!!!! Yay!!!
He's totally on Cloud 9 right now and has needed this for years & years & years.
He might get his own Gunther's truck in the next few weeks and possibly a raise. I'm so happy for him!!
So tell him congrats when you see him!
I love you Tyler!!!

Another Day Among Days Of Some Progress

Well right now Tyler is in Dallas, Texas, for a seminar given by Dani Johnson. I've listened to her off and on now for several weeks and bought some material of hers.I am really putting my faith in this woman. We've spent a lot already. I was supposed to go with Tyler to Dallas but two things happened: we couldn't get the money in our account fast enough to buy the plane tickets for the price we could afford and 2nd we could not find anybody to help watch our kids on three of the fours days we'd be gone. Thanks to my sister, Andrea, she would've been able to stay the nights and my brother, Glenn & his wife Andrea, would've had them all day Sunday. But Tyler's mom wouldn't take them on Saturday and our sister-in-law on Friday or Saturday and my mom on Monday. They had a couple things going on, but mostly I think it's that they didn't want to bother with it so much. A 3 and 1 year old are hard ages to watch sometimes. My 1 yr old especially is hard to watch! She gest into EVERYTHING. She's a busy little thing! She reminds me of her father in that way. Silently getting into mischeof (I know I can't spell!).Anyway, so here I sit, all alone at home. Right now the girls are with some friends of ours watching a movie and goofing around. It's 11:20pm!! But Sophie took a 5 hour nap today!! Yikes!! I hope this helps them sleep through the night because neither of them have been sleeping well for awhile now.Today I went to see a psychiatrist. YIKES I wasn't excited about that. I'm sitting there gabbing away and he wears his thoughts all over his face!! Oh my gosh. Yeah. It wasn't a miserable time but boy was I being read and judged. Oh my gosh.He diagnosed me with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (the Spirit told me I had this about a week ago already) and Depression. LOVELY. He even suspected a type of bi-polar.Oh my gosh I'm just a big mess. It sucks. He gave me a prescription for a cheap and good medication that should help calm my overly stressed out nerves and such. I hope I like it. I hope it's okay with my thyroid medication, which it probably is, but you know.And that brings me to my next thing: My Thyroid. Damned thing just doesn't want to work anymore!So it's a HYPO problem and I started medication not even two months ago. So far I can tell it's helping some. I'm losing a lot of hair though. I have been losing water weight and that's good. People say I'm looking better.I attribute to that to the GoYin I'm taking, though. Well, mostly anyway.It's done some amazing and neat and miraculous things for some people already. I've tried to take it consistently for 2 months now, but it's not been completely consistent. I can sure tell when I haven't taken it!! Tyler does great on it too, and so do my girls. It's such good stuff. And now that I'm talking about that I might as well mention here that in our OFFICIAL first week of being in GoYin (not on the TV show thank goodness) we made almost $1,000.00!! Yeah, great huh? But none since, dagnabbit. Of course that's only been like two weeks ago, but still.Tyler has been ON FIRE about it. I just wish others would BELIEVE us and catch the vision of it! Tyler wants this to be his way out of HAVING to work every day and living a better life. He is talking to so many people! I have been lazy in it, though. I actually have been lazy at EVERYTHING though! It's my depression. I seriously cannot help it. I'm too tired and losing interest in all sorts of things. IT SUCKS.And one of my friends let herself be convinced from her mother not to do GoYin. I'm so sad for her!! I was so excited for her to get somewhere and make a good life for her and her daughters! She reminded me of Dani Johnson herself in a lot of way. But what a sick and sad surprise. It broke my heart. She, of course, couldn't understand why it bothered me so much. I just hate seeing people giving up something that will change their lives for the better and forever.Just like when someone rejects the Gospel as I believe it and know it to be. It's a very sad day when someone says NO to something that will bring them better happiness, success, knowledge and peace in their lives.Oh I'm so tired! ack. I wish I was with Tyler! I NEEEDED this seminar!! I really hope Tyler's fire catches on to me. I really do!Okay, now to get off of this thing and see if I can clean up this messy office/toy room.And sit in front of the TV again and watch HGTV like usual.And pray that things start to turn for the better around here!