Update About Lacie

So it was like a miracle happened after Lacie got a blessing last night from her daddy and uncle Glenn Pearson. Today she hasn't had a fever, or at least not much of one anyway, and she hasn't shown that much that she's sick. I mean she still is, but she's MUCH better than yesterday! We were worried for her life yesterday and then today not so much.
We got test results back on two of the things we're worried about. She doesn't have Swine Flu or Pneumonia!!! So that's great news! She won't have to be hospitalized.
Now all we're waiting for are the tests for Diabetes, Celiac Disease, Melanoma, or possibly Leukemia and some other bacteria in her blood.
If her fever persists even a little we're supposed to bring her back on Monday to be tested again.
I feel a little more relieved today, but I am very, very worn out. All that's happened in the last several weeks has really taken it's tole on me. I'm pooped!!!
So we stayed away from everyone today and didn't have anyone over because the doc told us not to, and we still don't know everything she could have.
I do believe in Miracles and I believe there was one that happened here in our house with Lacie.
Now just another miracle that we won't be homeless next month and Tyler will have a job and we'll be able to take care of ourselves for a change! lol

And the winds keep on blowing (Poor Lacie!!)

There has been a lot more that has happened lately, and none of it has been good news. Okay ONE bit of good news. Tyler MIGHT have a job up in Layton working at the Hill Air Force Base making better money than he was with Gunther's Comfort Air. PLEASE PLEASE PRAY EARNESTLY THAT HE GETS THIS JOB!!!!!!!! Unless, of course, our Heavenly Father has other plans and sais NO.
Which has been his answer to every question we've asked so far ;)

So Tyler's cousin, Jake, passed away the week of Memorial Day. It was an awful and torturous week for us. Not just for Jake's sudden tragic and fatal condition, but the repercussions of hurt feelings forced back towards me. I cannot write about them here for fear of being sued or other such nonsense, so please just write me privately if you are curious.

The stress of Jake and his passing put Tyler and I physically ill. We had to have a bathroom close at hand. I'm still not better. I NEVER throw up but did so surprisingly one morning. No, it was no morning sickness, though I really sincerely wish it was.
Even my very honest Grandma Pearson noticed how dark under my eyes have gotten.
(bad grammar, I know, sorry).

So with our car being repossessed, no luck finding jobs for either of us (and YES we've applied at fast food joins, temporary jobs, everything!!!!!!!) and Tyler's truck being uninsured and the window breaking out and the fuel tank or pump breaking, among other things, and running out of food at the end of the month, every month..... okay I won't go on. It's just kinda pathetic and is just getting me more down to have to say it all. Let's just say that it's as low as it can get, or almost there anyway.

Our landlady served us an eviction letter to be out within 3 days. Out of desperation we called our bishop and asked if he could help. Thank you for our faithfulness in the Gospel because our entire rent was covered or we would honestly be in the homeless shelter in Provo. We actually went down there and met with a bishop of the place (not a religious person) and got the list of things we have to get together for next month when we will more than likely be evicted so that we can move in. That was enormous stress added to our heap of stress.

We have been sued FIVE TIMES now from doctors.
And my health isn't getting better. Sure you can think I'm some whiny person who asks for it or makes it up or whatever, but the fact of the matter is I have REAL issues and they've come to me in a very, very, very short amount of time!!! Why do you think I am so fat and look so awful?? DUH!!
Anybody who knew me, REALLY KNEW ME, would know that I was a very active, healthy, busy, hard-working and never-resting type of person. I was successful at everything I did. Nothing slowed me down. Not my endometriosis, breaking my leg, e-coli that nearly killed me, or anything. But when it's too much, IT'S TOO MUCH.
I feel like I am bearing more than I am able to and it's showing in so many ways.

My biggest concern is my family's well-being. I feel like a failure of a mother and Housewife. I want to be that housewife that can cook every meal and keep a schedule and a very clean house. I want to be that housewife that can teach her children the gospel and their school subjects. I want to be that housewife that has the energy to do normal things. But I am in constant pain and it is only getting worse.

ANYWAY!!!!!! Enough about me already!!!!!!

I am very deeply concerned about Lacie right now.
She's only 5 yrs old, almost 5 1/2. She's got to be one of the strongest and most perfect and special people I have ever known.
As a little background as to why I think this about her.
When she was born she would not cry. They tried and tried but she was 100% healthy and didn't want to cry. She looked at the nurses like "alright leave me alone, I'm just fine. Give me to my mother". As soon as I held her she just stared up into my eyes forever! She made eye contact with me and I knew right then that she was a very choice, strong and special spirit, older than I am, that God blessed me to be the mother of.
She never cried. She was the most perfect baby!!! It's been difficult to tell whenever she's sick or hurt because she won't complain about it. Not usually.
She suffered a severe seizure when she was just 2 years old. Perhaps some of you Pearson's will remember because it was the night of the Pearson Christmas reunion at uncle Kim's and aunt Marylou's. We stopped off at my inlaw's house. Anyway, she got her head slammed in a door and she already had a fever and it spiked. The impact, coupled with the spiked fever, sent her into a 45 minute seizure. She actually stopped breathing when I got to her! She was as limp as death when I held her and I panicked. I was pregnant with Sophie, due in mid-March. Lacie's little lips turned blue. Tyler called 911 and Tyler's dad, Gary, a previous EMT raced to her aid and saved her life. The Paramedics got there quickly but it still took them about 20-30 minutes since Saratoga Springs is so far from Lehi and American Fork. I rode with her in the ambulance. She re-gained consciousness in the ambulance but lay still.
In the hospital, as she lay in her bed and the entire family was in the ER gabbing away, Tyler and I saw her weakly sit up and point to a corner in the cieling and say "Jesus. Jesus" then lay back down.
She's broken both her arms and didn't cry. She's gotten two bad concussions and didn't cry. She won all baby pageants she's been in (except 1) and she's very gifted. She learns things usually the very first time it's taught to her with few exceptions.
Anyway, she's always been a very special and a very strong person.
Okay, now to get to what I really wrote this blog about!! lol
Lacie had a mole removed from her head in January. Over the last few years it'd been growing larger and larger and more recenlty started to bother her a little. I'd see her itching it.
The dermatologist said it didn't look good and sent in the mole he cut out to be biopsied. It came back as pre-cancerous and he was told to remove more of it if necessary (if he hadn't removed it all the first time, which he had). She had a check up in February and the mole had not healed. So he rescheduled again to have her seen just yesterday (actually it was Tuesday this week). He said it did not look good. It had not healed one bit since February!!! He was very concerned about this. He looked over the results again and decided that it would be the best thing to remove more. He took out 1 1/2" of her skin/flesh and gave her 9 stitches to close it back up!!!!!!!
He and the nurses said that Lacie was one of the best patients they have ever had. She didn't cry. She just laid perfectly still, with her eyes closed, patiently waiting for them to finish.
This is how Lacie is. Always has been.
So in two weeks roughly we'll find out if it is in fact Melanoma. I'm scared to death!!!!!!!

Then, to top it off. Today we took her in (Wednesday) to see her Pediatrician for her Kindergarten check up. Well, it wasn't good. Her doc is very concerned because Lacie's weight has been plummeting. It's completely dropped off the growth charts now! Her eye-sight has worsened, and her feet are worse.
From listening to her heart and looking her over and knowing about her broken bones and everything else the doctor was very worried and ordered a full blood test. They're testing for Leukemia, Celiac (what my mom has), diabetes (what my mom has), and any other types of cancer she could possibly have. Then we'll go from there.
Lacie eats. We feed her. But she doesn't have much of an appetite. She'll eat some food and fills up very quickly and loses her appetite. It's had me worried.
Her sleeping is sad, too. She grinds her teeth all night and moans and cries and calls for me in her sleep. She coughs all night, too. It really gets me worried sometimes, listening to her. I am constantly in her room checking on her for fear something bad has happened.
So in 3 days after getting her blood word done, which will be tomorrow (Thursday) morning, I'll know more answers, just not about the skin thing.

So every week there's been something happening.

It's just been too much. It really has! It's sucking all our strength out.
I'm tired of crying so much and tired of being so on the verge of tears all the time. I feel like a complete emotional wreck.
Tyler has had it.

What can you do when the problems you are having ARE NOT IN YOUR CONTROL AT ALL???? You cannot blame us for what we've been going through, period! Nothing could've stopped or prevented any of this from happening. At least the health issues. The financial issues are another issue all in themselves.
NO we have not been idiots with our money. We just don't have the same opportunities to money as most people we've known.

All we ask is that you keep us and especially Lacie in your prayers.
please pray for a MIRACLE.

A Personal Update... & Daniel's HOME!!!!!

He’s Home!!!!! among other things....

So my little brother, Daniel, just got back from his mission that he served faithfully and successfully in Milan, Italy!!! YAY!!!!

We all drove to the airport at 12:30am and waiting not too long for Dannerdeem to get off the plain! It was so cute cuz Lacie could remember him and just smiled and smiled at him! Sophie recognized him but she was SO SHY! She kept hiding her face. It was so cute!

As soon as I saw him I started to cry!!! AAAHH!!!! My mom ran up to him like a crazy-lady and threw herself on him crying. It was so sweet and special and exciting. Then my sister was right behind her and my dad then me. I was carrying my darling fire-ball niece, Maddison, Erik's 1 yr old, and had both my beautiful girls with me, too. They saw him next.

We all took some pics at the airport with other families and of returned missionaries from Daniel's mission and around there.

Now get this, their flight WAS supposed to come in at 7:30 pm!! Wow so we waited forever!!! We helped clean and decorate mom's house for him, too.

Also, we've reheared (for like 10 minutes TOPS, as usual) to play in Andrea's single's ward Christmas program. Me violin, Andrea viola, Erik cello, mom cello, and Dad, Tyler, Glenn, Daniel, Michael & Joshua all singing. Our rehearsals are VERY INTERESTING. There is a lot of major goofing off that goes on and yelling, too!! hahaha. We have a blast. And we're all LOUD! haha. And we usually sound really super crappy when we rehearse, but then when it comes time to perform we all do pretty good, I think. I mean, people in Lehi always ask us to play for church and wedding stuff, so we must not suck, right? I'm just so glad Tyler is going to sing this time!! He has a GREAT voice, but he's so shy with it! LOL

Okay, so we've been sooooo busy getting ready for Daniel and now we're having parties for him. It's so exciting!! We haven't seen him for TWO YEARS!!! So if any of you feel like we've deserted you for this very special occassion, we're sorry. Tyler and I both decided this took priority over other events and what-not.... but family and friends are not forgotten.
Okay, back to "other things" lol.

So I'm having "health issues" AGAIN. Actually have been for a little while, just been trying to ignore them. Though, when it comes down to it all, after seeing a doc, I'm thinking my "issues" are just something like Irritable Bowel Syndrome or my Gastritis (which I know I have already) flaring up with my Endometriosis and my Thyroid hormone levels changing again. BLAH. I hate this. It's so annoying. I take 5 pills a day now, and will be taking 1-2 more a day now. I'm 30! Not 50 or 60!! Sheeeesh!! lol

So I had MAJOR stomach cramping the other day. Every time I eat my stomach bloats up HUGE and I look very super pregnant. It's so uncomfortable! I find it funny when people look at me thinking I'm pregnant and smile. It's hilarious. They think, "aww, a pregnant lady!!" and I think, "aw, they think I'm pregnant! hahahaha".

We went to see A Christmas Carol put on by the Grooms family that used to own and run CEnter Street mUscial Theater that we used to play in the orchestra pit for and act in's last performance EVER. It was sad!! I mean, it was GOOD, but we were all sad that it's all over now! Anyway, afterward Sharalyn Grooms, the mommy, thought I was preggo and poked my belly. hahahahahaha!!!!! I thought it was so funny!! I should've said, "ooh! ooh!" like the PIllsbury Dough Boy but I didn't want to embarrass her further when I said, "nope, I'm not!". She's had 7 kids and had a tummy tuck a couple years back she told me. That'll probably be me, too. My mom HAS to have one cuz her belly's herniated severely!!! She's SUPER skinny, but has that poky-outy-belly. poor mom!! She's in her 50's and people STILL ask if she's pregnant!!! lol
Okay, anyway, back to my tummy pain.

So it was sooooo bad I couldn't move at all. I was extremely nauseated. Here's the deal. I CANNOT throw up. You think lucky me? NO WAY!!!! Not being able to throw up is WORSE than throwing up. I know, cuz I've done both! lol. My stomach hurts and cramps seriously and severely because I cannot throwup to relieve the crampiness or nausea like most people do. I'm sure I had the stomach flu, but it was soooo amplified by my Acid Reflux and my Gastritis.

Anyway, by the end of that one day I coudln't move, I hadn't eaten ANYTHING or drank ANYTHIGN. I could not. I was soooo sick. Wow yeah. So I went into the InstaCare cuz I just couldn't function. They did blood work on me to see if it's a Peptic Ulcer. I would not be surprised.... but I haven't heard back from them, so I'm guessing it's not. The doc said I have to see my regular doc to get an Endoscopy to see if I have stomach cancer or pancreatic cancer.

Pancreatic Cancer is more likely he said because of having my gall bladder removed at a young age for being DISEASED and not contaminated like most people's are. I was skinny, young, and female, which made my gall bladder disease very very rare. And a lot more serious. They warned me that having it removed will increase my chances for having stomach or pancreatic cancer by like 20-30% more likely. Plus my acid reflux doesn't help that much, either. And all the meds I take. And the endometriosis.

BUT, I think I'm okay. I can feel something's wrong... but I'm sure it's not serious, just annoying. It's probably Irritable Bowel Syndrome or just all my other illnesses really acting up due to the stress I've been under. That's very likely.

Oh, and still not pregnant. BUMMER. I'll be starting Clomid soon to hopefully induce pregnancy, which will increase my chances of having twins, which I DO hope I have! I want more than 2 kids! 2 kids are not enough!! I want at least 4 kids!!

Let's see, what else.

Oh, Lacie gets to start piano lessons soon! I'm sooooooo excited!!!!! I think she'll do great! I did teach her violin lessons when she was 3 for a few months or a year and she did really well for her age. I am almost Suzuki Instructor Certified (have to finish some practice hours training then I'll be ligit) but it was fun practicing with Lacie. I'm sure we'll get her started up when we can afford the violin rental again. Or cello. Or whatever else she'd like to play.

Ummm..... what else.

OH! I now am a Mary Kay Constultant!!! I'm dead serious about this now because I tried doing it YEARS ago but had horrible team members and NO training or anyting!! Plus, I was just getting engaged then married and having LOTS of family problems and trials, a very sick pregnancy that was high-risk, and many, many other problems, so I could not do it. Anyway, I wanna let any of you know that like Mary Kay products or want to try any that you can contact me. For family I'll give a discount. OKAY OKAY for some friends I might, too . But if anyone wants to host a party for me to practice with I'd LOVE it!! I'll give you a prize, do all the inviting, and set the whole darned thing up!!! So let me know, ? And you won't have to buy anything and I won't expect you to, either. (though that WOULD be nice cuz it'll help us out, but that's okay if not!!).

And, I'm seriously considering going to dental school... or at least getting a certificate to be a Dental ASsistent. Cool, eh? I'd be working with my cousin from my mom's side and with my cousin from my dad's side's girlfriend!! WEird, eh? Tyler's excited for me.

OH!!! AND, I get to be on a website for Jed Knudsen being a Website "celebrity" by working for clients... go to http://www.websitetalkingheads.com to see what it is exactly that I'll be doing. Jed called me personally to ask me to work for him!! YIPEEEE!!! It really pays to have connections!! I will make upwards of 1500.00 to 2000.00 or more a month!! YAY!!!!! And that's doing very, very little. I'm so stoked! So excited!!

Oh, Jed's kinda a famous guy. First, he did my photos for Mrs Utah United States Pageant, our temple sealing day photos, and several LDS themed movies. Just look him up. Jed Knudsen. He did "People Say The Darndest Things About Mormon's", among other things. And a Craig Swapp ad like I did. And other movies. Anyway, he and I swear we know each other from some other time but cannot remember for the life of us!!! hahaha. I don't know if he realizes I've gained so much weight since he saw me last, BUT, maybe he saw me on TV and thought I'd be okay anyway. So yeah, I think i t'll be really fun.

Okay, what else. (I know, that's getting redundant!!)

Oh, Tyler's stressed super super super bad!!!! well, me too obviously or my body wouldn't be freaking out like it is LOL. We apparently owe MORE than $10,000.00 in medical debt. Oh sure, that might sound like a small or reasonable amount of money, nothing big, to lots of people, but to US, it's HUGE and impossible to pay off. That's not our only debt, either. Credit cards were a NECESSITY to pay for gasoline, food, clothing, etc.
And then there were some stupid debts we accrued, but nothing huge, just little things here and there. We've been harshly judged in the past and people think we've spent our money foolishly and are not paying for it. Um, look at our medical debt. That's not our fault at all. Come to our house and see what we own. OLD and used furniture, and PAID for table & chairs, etc. We aren't as foolish as many of you think, honestly.
Okay, enough of that!!

Right now we feel soooooo bad that we can't help others with their Christmas!! If any of you need or would like to know some who NEED help this year here are a few:
Kristen & Kevin Lanier (just had a new baby). Tau & Mollee Suafo'a (having a new baby any day or already did). Joe & Regina Pearson. My parents & siblings. Michelle Wolfert's and her girls.

And I'm sure there are more that I just can't think of at this time. hee hee. I'm sure this'll embarrass them, but they need help.
Normally we'd be buying more for others than for ourselves. We've needed food and other necesities, but this year Christmas is good. It's worked out. We're really excited!! I wish we could get stuff for all the people I mentioned above!! I wish that the wealthy people we know would have some charity to help, too. It's sad. I know soooooo many WEALTHY people who pretend they aren't wealthy or cry they're poor or think they make "normal" amounts of money but in reality they're very wealthy and won't help anyone cuz they blame everyone for their own circumstances and blah blah blah.
Wow I have a really tender and sore spot there about that. AFter all, my parents and us have been GREATLY misjudged by friends and family alike where the finances are concerned.

You know we went to a special place to see if we could consolidate our debt and after reviewing everything three times they said "the only hope for you guys is to either stop paying your tithing and eventually get your debt paid down until we can help you or file bankruptcy". Wow, that was a kick in the gut. So we feel kinda helpless about our situation, but we are not losing hope!! No way Jose!!!! We believe we can get ourselves out of this!! We're both going to do our very best to do that. Even if we end up losing everything while getting there!!!

Okay, I want you all to know that I love Tyler will alllll of my heart, soul and mind. I love my beautiful girls as much but in different and in some similar ways. I love all my family, even if some of them hate me (which some of said they do, immature jerks), and I love all my friends. I have a testimony of God's love for me and my family and of everyone. I have a testimony of God's church & kingdom. I love Christmas and am very excited for it. It's a beautiful time of year for so many reasons! I used to be a true-blue Scrooge!! But thank you Tyler, you saved me!

LOL. I am happy, and doing my best, and growing and learning and trying to be my best. If you are offended by anything I say or do, well, that's your problem for being offended (hee hee hee). I cannot please everyone and I've wasted too much of my life trying to do so to the extent that I was trying at. Of course I'll always be a people-pleaser. God made me that way for a reason, and a good one at that I am sure, but I'm not going to kill myself trying to please EVERYONE, especially those that just can never be satisfied.

WOW am I long-winded this morning!!! It's probably cuz I'm taking an Oxycodone thanks to my arthritis and cramps and BAD tummy pains, but eh, whatever!!!

Oh, guess what I ate today? I had 1/2 of an Arby's melt and like 3 curly fries before I felt like I was going to die and puke while doing so, then later finished the rest. That's it. Yeps. All I could handle today. Food is gross. YUCK!!! hahaha.

okay, this is soooo long I highly doubt anybody read this!!! Maybe Kathy & Kimberley did... Amy MIGHT, but I'm sure she's going to be SUPER SUPER busy thanks to coming to Utah to visit (HALLELUIA!!) and Aunt Kay might, if she checks this.... but otherwise, eh, oh well. This was mostly for me, anyway. But I love you all!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!