He's Listening

So things have been hard for us lately, no matter how optimistic we try to be, that's the truth. I know everybody struggles with things in their life that are hard at any given time, and sometimes we're blessed with breaks here and there I think, and other times we're blessed with really hard times that really can make or break a person depending on how they choose to accept it.
Right now things are very, very hard. I'm trying my best to be happy for the girls and Tyler and myself and others, and I know I greatly fall short of this, but I am doing my best and with the Lord's help I'm doing even better than I thought possible for myself.


Yesterday, after a bit of bad news here and there, I was home alone (for once lol) and felt it safe to let my emotions out for a few minutes and allowed myself to cry. Or better yet, the tears just came and I didn't have to worry about hiding them like usual.
So I bawled my eyes out and was feeling very weak (as some people have called me) and pathetic and just a little hopeless and started praying to help me feel strengthened somehow and to please bless me with any good news for a change or something to keep me going. I prayed to know if Heavenly Father was hearing me, was aware of what we are going through, and if I'm all alone or have support. 
I went back out to my car where groceries were waiting in the trunk to be taken out and as I opened the trunk a car pulled up behind me. I turned and two members of my bishopric came out of the car.
I assumed they were looking for my parents, obviously, since this is their home, and felt really embarrassed that they caught me crying like an idiot. I told them nobody was home and where my dad was (at the church at the time, with  my girls), and they said "we're here to see you". 
They said they'd felt impressed to visit me.


They asked me how I was doing and I was actually kinda shocked at first and didn't really know what to say. Then I started to tell them a little bit about what was going on. They offered to help me with anything I needed. So I finally gave in and let them help me bring my groceries in, which was wonderful since the amount of pain I was in was a lot, and then my brother Josh showed up so we weren't alone in the house. It was so perfect. They asked what else they could do for me and I felt prompted to ask for a blessing. I received a blessing and a feeling of love enveloped me by the Lord. I felt comforted, loved, protected, understood, sheltered, and uplifted.


My testimony was strengthened last night as a result of this. I was feeling so sad and was asking Heavenly Father for anything, really, and he sent two angels to me right in the moment that I needed them most! He answered my prayer the instant I asked, and blessed me greatly!
I felt his love and I can tell you it was similar to what Alma the Younger said in the Book of Mormon in Alma 36:21: "Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy."
Maybe my experience wasn't as grand, huge, and miraculous as Alma the Younger's was, but this is how I felt, or something very similar to it, and I know it was from my loving Heavenly Father. 


God does love us. He is aware of what we are going through and what our needs are. He understands us. And, above all else, He is listening. 
He heard my  prayers and answered them, strengthening me, lifting me, and enveloping me with the compassion, love, and sympathy I so needed and only He can understand that I need, and needed, so much. 
Thank you for blessing me with the Gift of the Holy Ghost and for my membership in God's Church where the Priesthood is real and alive and true. 

Tyler's job is worse than I thought!!!!

So I know that I complained about Tyler's job in the last blog, and that I wrote very recently, but here I am again updating it even more after talking to Tyler today.
He got home in the very early hours of the morning and when I saw him today, this afternoon, he did NOT look happy at all! He looks miserable!! My poor Tyler!!!!

He told me today that not only do they cut the drive time out of his pay and the overtime hours out, but they expect him to go to the shop at 7:pm and he won't get paid until 9:pm!! So ANOTHER wasted 2 hours!!!
Also, he works with ex-cons, men on parole from prison, and those that are required to get tested for drugs regularly. He HATES it!! It is just too much for him. It's not a good place, especially for Tyler.
They all smoke all the time, like I said, but that has really made Tyler the most uncomfortable. It makes him physically sick. He HATES cigarette smoke and just cannot respect people who smoke like that. He thinks they're *sick*.

Then last night/this morning, he said it was just the ultimate. They speak so bad and are just the epitome of vulgar talking about sex and women's body parts in great and graphic detail and they're VERY VERY disrespectful. He hears this the entire time he's at work. And No he cannot put in head phones at his job. It's too dangerous. That and also every other word is the F word and that can get overly offensive.
Now he's tried to tune them out, but last night hit the worst. HIS BOSS brought porn to work!!!!! He brought it and ALL of them gathered around and were looking at it but Tyler. He kept away and was thoroughly disgusted. Tyler cannot respect a man who looks at that garbage and he was so offended by their disrespect and weakness and immoral behavior and speech that he had his boss sign his time card, loaded up and left.

Then his boss being a jerk called Tyler while Tyler was on his way home and said "where'd you go? I didn't dismiss you from work". Even though the time card was signed and the job was all done. I think he just didn't like that Tyler had left upset and wouldn't look at the porn with them.

Also, they stole two of his batteries!!! That was another 200.00 bucks down the drain!!!!!!!
Tyler is soooooooo mad and disappointed and disgusted.

TYLER TAKING THIS JOB AND WORKING HIS BUTT OFF SHOWS HIS LOVE FOR HIS FAMILY!!!!!!! HE'S DOING WHATEVER HE CAN TO TAKE CARE OF ALL OF US AND HE'S SACRIFICED SO MUCH AND ALL FOR NOTHING!!!!!!! I just hope and pray that our Heavenly Father sees Tyler's great efforts and loyalty and BLESSES HIM FOR IT with a decent job!! He DESERVES a good job!!! He's smart and a very hard worker, he has great work ethic.

So now I know why I wasn't super excited about this job. I couldn't feel really happy about it and I was SICK about it from the very beginning. Everyone kept telling me "don't stress about it. It'll work out" etc etc but I KNEW it was bad. This isn't on Tyler at all. I love Tyler so much and my respect for him just doubled! If that's possible ;). Tyler is a REAL MAN. He's a real man because HE works and doesn't make me do it, he's a real man because he does what it takes to take care of his family, and he's a real man ESPECIALLY because he stands up for what is right!!!!!!! He doesn't put up with this garbage and he's not going to any longer.
He's going to quit. And like always, I support him 100%.

I love to support my husband. Just like in the Proclamation to the World, Tyler and I support each other. I don't take over his job and he doesn't take over mine, that's not what it means. I support Tyler in all that he does trusting fully in him to do what is right because I know he will. Because Tyler keeps God's commandments to the best of his ability, and because I know his head is on straight, I trust him to always make the best choice. Of course he has flaws like we all do, but I choose not to dwell on them. Tyler knows that he has my full support and he's allowed complete freedom because he's his own man and he knows I respect that. I'm just so blessed to have married a man that continues to grow in leaps and bounds and WOW he's more of a man every day in my eyes.
I just keep praying that Heavenly Father will bless him with a decent job that he deserves.
I mean gosh, I can't even get a job and Tyler is way more qualified to get a better job than I can because of his experience.
If I had a car I'd get a part-time job. None of the businesses close to us that I could walk to are hiring. But you know, I feel that we're doing what we're supposed to be doing, even though many others doubt that. It's not up to other people what we do, it's between Tyler and I and the Lord, and I fully believe that we're doing what's right and the best we can.

Like Lacie going to public school. We both know it's RIGHT for her at this time. I don't know what the future holds, but it's the way Heavenly Father wants it right now. We live where he wants us right now, and we're doing the best we can and that's all Heavenly Father asks is that we do our best.
After all, he has told us that we should not run faster than we are able. I see too many people doing this and it's not healthy on many levels.

Okay now I'm rambling. I just have a lot to write right now. I have a lot in my mind. And a lot in my heart.
Soon I get to go walk and pick up my perfect little Lacie from school at her second day at school. She's such a good girl and I'm sure had a great time today. She was so excited to go she forgot to say Bye to me!! hahaha.

I love my little family with all my heart and they're everything to me. My entire world! And they're more important to me than school or a job or my own personal endeavors/desires and I feel extremely blessed to have them in my life.

Peace & Happiness

You know, even though there's a LOT going on in our lives and we've been through a LOT since we've been married, and especially in the last 3-4 years, we still feel peace and happiness of a special type.

No matter what happens and the crap we go through and the crap that is said about us and to us and how we're treated by those who should be called "loved ones" and no matter how much we're judged and how hard we work to be put down again and again we can always know that we're doing our best and that we don't give up.

We've been hearing more and more of members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, ones that have been to the Temples and been sealed for Time & Eternity, dropping away, losing their faith, and even some of them becoming agnostic or even Atheist.

How have we not done this ourselves?

Well, it's really simple, and because of how simple it is it's hard for people to really believe it and to know how to grasp and understand it.

Tyler and I may have a lot of gospel knowledge and yada yada, but the bottom line is this: keeping the commandments of God and keeping our covenants we've made with God from our baptisms and going through the Temple and then getting sealed.

The LITTLE things matter the MOST.

Reading the scriptures, praying daily, going to church, paying tithing, going to the temple, having Family Home Evening, etc. It does not require much at all to do these things. Oh, and a BIGGIE. Keeping the Word of Wisdom.

The Word of Wisdom is exactly that. A WORD OF WISDOM. It comes from God.
Those who choose to smoke and drink are literally clogging their spiritual pores. Oh sure laugh it up if you want to, or better yet, get offended LOL. But it's true. Just plain and simply that, it's true.
Doing things that are contrary to what God has asked us to do is damaging and damning in every sense of those words.

Tyler and I have been very, very careful to never break the Word of Wisdom, to always pay a full tithe, and keep up with our reading and praying and these things alone have kept our testimonies firm.

There have been countless chances we've had to leave the church or start to look into another religion or just quit, but how can one do that when they're sure about what they're doing is right and that the Spirit is with them, building them up, strengthening them, guiding them, supporting them, loving them, comforting them, and blessing them with miracles every day?

How could Tyler and I turn our backs on our ETERNAL FAMILY and our testimonies when God has given us so much and done so much for us?

If anybody needs a sign of proof about God's love and existence it's not in material blessings, it's not in healthy bodies, it's not in fame and fortune or recognition or a calm and event-less life. It's not a constant SUREITY of God's existence or of miracles or angels or truth or anything like that. It's not getting what you want or what you think you deserve or what you think would be best for you or your family. It's not even saving a loved one from death.
It's the fact that he let his Son suffer, bleed and die. It's the fact that he allowed his earthly children to torture, ridicule, reject, beat and then ultimately kill His Only Begotten Son. He allowed this because it was THE ONLY WAY that we could receive Salvation and hopefully Eternal Life if we so choose it. JESUS CHRIST IS THE SIGN. He is the proof.

No matter what happens to Tyler and I, or anybody else we know, Tyler and I always have this great PEACE and HAPPINESS that we feel on a daily basis, if even for a moment, that we have an Eternal Family. That we will be together forever, perfect, immortal, glorious, and with our family and friends who so choose to follow the same path. We know that there is a greater reward waiting for us after this life and it's worth all the hell and torment we could possibly endure in this life to attain all that God has promised us.

I know for a certainty that's indescribable that Jesus Christ lives and that he died for every one of us and lives now. I know with a strong hope and faith that my family, Tyler, Lacie, Sophie and I, will all be together forever and ever, never to die again, never to suffer again. I know that no matter what people say or do all around us, and while friends and family and people we don't know very well fall away and deny the faith and lose their faith and go off on their own ways and who snub us for our faith, that we are doing what is right and we are doing our best and we are choosing to keep the faith and we are choosing to do what's right and work as hard as we can to keep this.

Nothing is worth losing your family after death.
NOTHING.

And please don't try to comfort yourself into thinking that EVERYONE will be with their families forever, because they will not if they choose not to do what's necessary to receive this gift. Sure, we'll all live again one day, but there's a difference between being SEALED to your family and just living again. Tyler and I know this, and we're staying away from the things that could tear our Eternal Family apart, including not breaking the Word of Wisdom and all that other stuff I already mentioned.

This is my testimony and I just felt to share it.
In Jesus' Name.

GOOD NEWS!!!

So today I took Lacie to get her 9 stitches out of her head and her Dermatologist said that her results had come and it was only an ulcer!!! I was pleasantly surprised and I was SO HAPPY I cried when we left!
Then as we were leaving I got a text message from my little brother, Glenn, that his wife had had their baby early this morning!! She was in labor for TWO HOURS and pushed him out in 15 minutes!! He weighed 7.6 lbs and 18.5 inches long. He has a little mullet lol. And he looks just like his mother, Andrea!! Except his top lip looks like Glenn's haha. They named him Brayden Taylor Pearson. We were so excited to go see him today!

Last night I only had 2 hours of sleep because a lot was on my mind. New problems that arose unexpectedly this week that I cannot mention caused great stress in our family, plus the anxiety of waiting to hear about Lacie's pre-cancerous mole (which, he said, we still have to keep our eyes on just in case) and just thinking about our dire situation.
I laid in bed finally at 3:00am or a little after and said a little prayer. Very calmly and without great emotion but with sincerity and faith and asked Heavenly Father what we need to do to help us. He told me two things just as plain as day and then told me to get up and go downstairs and write down the revelation I was receiving. So I did just that. Since it's personal for my family I won't mention it here, but now Tyler and I are going to follow what I was told as clear and plainly as if God were standing there talking to me face-to-face and put it to the test because Heavenly Father promised me that if we do these 2 things that he will bless us and take care of us.
What I do know without any doubt whatsoever was that I was truly inspired by God and that he spoke with me and gave me very specific things to do and very specific promises if we follow what he asked us to do.
He also told me that Satan has been working very hard on our marriage to make us divorce because if we do then Tyler will not be able to fulfill his mission in this life nor will I, so now we're ready or being prepared for our missions. That's all I can say about that.

This morning I woke up early and couldn't go back to sleep again. I got up and checked my email and had received a message from the church saying EXACTLY one of the impressions I'd received so clearly. It was the oddest thing ever! The email was sent at 7:00am and I read it at 7:15am, hours after the revelation I'd received at 3:15am. I knew it was from God.
Go read D&C 88:119 for a very good clue as to what part of the revelation to me was about.

So anyway, there we are. I'm thinking more positive. I figure whatever happens to us isn't by accident and isn't because God doesn't care, but because he loves us and it is NECESSARY for us to go through all these trials. We HAVE to go through them. I don't know why, I just KNOW this for certain. So that gives me peace knowing that none of this is punishment but necessary for our growth and experience.

I also was told that as soon as we get everything in line for the positive changes we are to make or that the changes are completely made that I'll get pregnant again.

But I know that God will take care of us. He always does, if we do what he asks us to do.

Lacie broke her arm!!!!!!!

My poor little Lacie (the 5 yr old) broke her arm!!! This is the SECOND time
but on the OTHER arm! The first time was due to her daddy pushing her in the
Home Depot parking lot at top speed while she stood in the basket (against her
mother's wishes) instead of being seat belted in! Tyler took a corner a bit
too fast and Lacie went flying out of the cart, head first, onto the black top.
She suffered a severe concussion and broke both bones in her left fore-arm. Like
a BAD break! Luckily the bones didn't come out the skin, but her arm was like
jello! She didn't cry a single tear! So, tonight we'd gotten back from
Kadie & Tony's after having loads of fun watching the first Tomb Raider and
watching the guys play their Gran Turismo 4 game on the PS2, eating a delicious
dinner made by Kadie and eating some disgusting donuts brought by me, and got
the girls in their jammies and we were about ready to say family prayer when the
girls got wild and ran upstairs and started jumping on our bed (that's a no-no)
and giggling and laughing hysterically while Tyler and I talked downstairs for a
couple minutes about his history test he was about ready to start when we both
heard this loud BANG and then a few moments later a very freaked out and
panicked cry from Lacie. "Uh oh! That doesn't sound good!" So Tyler ran up there
and I walked (there's LOTS & LOTS of drama in this house with three girls
hee hee so I didn't realize it was an emergency) and Lacie was crying more from
being frustrated that we weren't up there right when it happened. She accused
me, while sitting at the top of the stairs cradling her right arm, "mom! You
were supposed to be there to catch me when I fell!!" Isn't that just the most
ironic and saddest thing?? Aren't parents supposed to be there when we fall
to catch us? That's what parents are for, right? No, I'm NOT feeling guilty cuz
it was totally not my fault, but I sure thought about that a little when she
said that. Anyway, I felt soooo bad!! She said, "I broke it! I broke my arm!
I broke the bones inside of my arm". I held her arm and her hand and they were
very loose and weak and wobbly. I KNEW it was broken just by the feel of it.
Last time she broke her arm (when she was 2 1/2) I had to hold her broken arm
then and it was grotesque!! But I know the feeling of a broken bone and I knew
it was this time, too. I held her in the car (I know that's a big no-no, too)
and we hurried to Orem Community Hospital ER with poor Sophie crying in her
carseat the entire time. She was totally confused and freaked out, poor little
thing! I called my parents and they and Josh hurried down from Lehi where
they met us in our ER room. Now get this. Lacie was perfectly CALM. She was just
fine! No crying, totally collected and reasonable and talkative, even started to
move her arm and hand around a bit and wiggle her fingers. The nurse-chick comes
in to check her. Now if any of you have ever brought your kids to the
doctor's or the ER for stuff like this they HAVE to check for signs of abuse. I
am so glad they do this!! There are so many reported cases of children coming in
with broken bones and bruises and the parents try to hit it off as some stupid
freak child accident when in fact THEY did it to their own children!! Pisses me
off royally! So they checked all her bones for any other possible breaks,
checked her head since she did bang that pretty hard on the wall, checked the
back of her neck in case she hurt it from banging her head, and checked for
bruises and for a fever. She DOES have a fever. 100.6! So they tested her
for strep. Luckily she got over that, but we figure she has the flu cuz the when
the nurse asked where she hurt she said EVERYWHERE! hahaha. When the nurse
asked her how bad her pain was and showed her little smiley-face pictures for
kids to see Lacie pointed at the #10 one!! Well, outwardly there was NOOOOO WAY
of knowing she hurt that bad!!! But she was pretty darn adament about that #10
being her worst pain! So, the nurse was thinking Lacie was being dramatic,
my parents did, and Tyler and I wondered, too, because she really CAN
be. They all decided they didn't think it was broken. They ordered x-rays
and she got pushed in a wheel chair. When the x rays were all done (she held
perfectly still) the radiologist had this little smile on his face and didn't
say a word. I was like, "hmmm". Then the doc came in before he saw the x rays
and evaluated her himself and said he didn't think it was broken because she was
acting like everything was just honkey-dorey, besides saying where it hurt. Then
he went out and looked at the x rays and came back in. His face!!
hahaha! He was completely shocked!! He said, "well, she's right! She knows
it's broken because it is!" She broke BOTH bones in her right fore-arm. Not
as bad as she broke the left arm 2 1/2 years ago, but bad enough! He was sooo
surprised! She broke it pretty good, he said. She had to have landed on that arm
really hard. And judging by the break he said she had to have landed on the palm
of her hand which took the brunt of her fall. He'd asked before if she felt
the bone break and she said Yes. He kinda had smirked at that, but now he knew
she knew exactly what she was talking about! My Lacie is no
dummy!! And, she takes after her mother having and EXTREMELY high tolerance
to pain!! Although mine has worn off A LOT hahaha. This little girl of
ours is amazing. I'm not bragging or exagerating, but she's near
perfect. She's extremely brilliant. She's so mature. She's so special and
unique. She really is my angel! It was a MIRACLE that I got pregnant with
her. Totally a shock! Not only was I NOT supposed to be able to have kids but I
was on birth control, too! I KNEW she wanted to come here and I could feel her
spirit before we even got married that she was in a big hurry to get here. I got
pregnant with her right after we got married. That very same month!! She was the
most PERFECT PERFECT PERFECT baby anybody could ever hope for or wish for or
dream for. Ask anyone who knew her. She was flawless. She even won all the
baby pageants we put her in!! hahaha. She won everyone's heart. She still
does, when she doesn't get all dramatic! lol Anyway, she's doing so
bravely right now. She's knocked out on Lortab on our couch, silently
sleeping. No crying or whimpering or complaining. Just being perfect, like
herself. :) If anyone wants to come see her this week PLEASE PLEASE DO!!!
She LOVES people (just like her mommy does) and LOVES visitors! And LOVES LOVES
LOVES CHOCOLATE!!! :) So if anyone feels like coming to spoil my little
girl please do, k? I'm not begging for a hand-out, just thinking about what
would make her happy. I'm sure she'd love to tell her arm-breaking story over
and over and over again like she does about her first arm-breaking experience!
lol She'd especially love to see any of her friends! Okay, I'm
babbling cuz it's late and I'm super super tired and love-struck by my amazing
daughter.

Pray for change or pray for strength?

So lately a realization hit me. Tyler and I have been through a lot since before we got married and are still going through some really hard times. I've always prayed that my problems would go away or change or something would make the problems better or something like that. I was always thinking, "God never answers my prayers!!!" I got mad and blamed God and even started to doubt him and even his existence.

Well, in the last few weeks, or months I guess, actually, I changed my prayers for the most part to include something like this instead: "Please bless me with the strength, faith and encouragement to withstand these hard times"... etc. I don't repeat all my prayers. They're not memorized. I pray with my heart and mean every word I say.

So instead of praying for something to go away or change, I prayed for strength to deal with what I had to go through. Well, I shouldn't have to say this but I will anyway, it worked!
I have been at more peace and a lot happier since I've started praying like this.

I recently lost one of my best friends. I feel completely used by her and taken advantage of. I cried myself to sleep a few nights and couldn't sleep the rest of the time, even woke up super early and couldn't get back to sleep cuz I was just so upset over the entire ordeal.

I was super upset about all of this. So finally I prayed and asked Heavenly Father if he would help me shoulder this heartache. I knew I couldn't change any of it. I did the absolute best thing I could do to rectify and clear things up, but relationships never work if both people aren't willing to give their all to it. So I knew I had to go through this. And also to learn a lesson or two, or twenty, so instead I prayed for strength to go through it. Well, the next morning I woke up happy, refreshed, and not feeling all depressed or feeling any despair! I felt good!

I've found that instead of trying to get God to feel sorry for me and change my circumstances and praying for strength and faith to withstand or remain strong then my prayers are answered!!!
It makes me happy to know God IS THERE!!!!!! He DOES listen!!!!!

He CANNOT take choices away from people. So people will always be bad and mean, people will always be selfish and hurtful, people will always lie and steal, kill and abuse. People will always have their own choices to do whatever the heck they want!! So that will always directly or indirectly affect us.

Our own choices determine to an enormous extent the situations in which we find ourselves on a daily basis and they change the course of our lifetime all the time! So... God CANNOT take these choices away from us or anyone else. But what he CAN do is give us the strength to get through them!

He can "carry our crosses", so to speak, through all the hard times we have.
I mean, that's one of the blessings WE ALL HAVE thanks to the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
I love my Heavenly Father.... but I'm sure not even close as much as he loves me!!!!

Who, And What, Is God

I've been wanting and thinking and feeling that I should write about God. So I'll do that today, being Sunday, and I feel that it's appropriate for the Sabbath.

The first and most important thing we must come to learn, understand, believe in and accept is the knowledge of God, who he is, how he is, and how that relates to and affects us as individuals and as a whole.

Over time God has had many different names and identities to all people. Everybody sees him in a different light and level of belief.

Where did God come from? When and where did the idea of God first come from anyway?

There are many different books of scripture (Holy Word) that come from "the beginning of time" or the "beginning of all things" or just the "beginning of this world".

History books and stories, legends and ghost stories all take us back to the belief of a God, or gods, and Lucifer, or Satan, the Devil, the Adversary, the Fallen Star, etc.

These are the most ancient and legendary stories of all.

Men throughout time have changed, made up, written, told, believed and dreamed up stories about God and the Adversary.

So which books are true?

Well, that's for you to decide, based on two things: Logic & Feeling.

Now, the most basic and logical beliefs of God, from my personal opinion and based on scripture, are as follows:

God Lives; he is live and living (Gen 1:27; Ex 31:18; Luke 24:39; John 14:9; D&C 130:1; D&C 130:22; Mosiah 7:27).

God is Immortal and does not change (Psa 102:27; Heb 13:8; Moroni 10:7; D&C 20:11-12; D&C 76:4).

God knows all things (Jer 1:5; Acts 2:23; 1 Nephi 9:6; 2 Nephi 2:24; W of M 1:7; Abr 2:8).

God is glorious (Ex 24:7; Num 14:21; Ps 19:1; Isa 40:5; Matt 6:13; Luke 2:9; Luke 9:32; John 1:14; Philip 4:20; Titus 2:13; 2 Nephi 12:19; Mosiah 4:12; D&C 4:5; Moses 1:5).

God is intelligent (Isa 55:8; D&C 88:41; Abr 3:19).

God loves (Deut 7:8; Isa 63:7; Jer 31:3; Mal 1:2; John 3:16; John 13:1; 1 Jn 3:1; 2 Nephi 1:15; Alma 13:29; 4 Nephi 1:15; D&C 95:1; D&C 138:3).

God is merciful (Ex 34:6; Deut 4:31; 2 Sam 24:14; Ps 69:16; Ps 116:5; Isa 49:15; Eph 2:4; Titus 3:5; James 5:11; 2 Nephi 4:26; 2 Nephi 9:8; Alma 9:26; Alma 42:15; Moroni 8:19; D&C 84:102).

God is perfect (Deut 32:4; 2 Sam 22:31; Matt 5:48; Heb 5:9; Heb 6:18; James 1:13).

God is powerful (Gen 17:1; 1 Sam 14:6; Jer 32:17; Jer 51:15; Matt 8:26; Matt 19:26; Matt 28:18; John 10:18; Heb 1:3; 1 Nephi 4:1; Mosiah 4:9; Alma 26:35; Hel 12:11; D&C 61:1).

God is wise (Job 36:5; Ps 136:5; 1 Cor 3:19; 2 Nephi 9:8; Jacob 4:10; Mosiah 4:9; Alma 26:35; D&C 9:3; D&C 10:43; D&C 76:2).

So we've been taught and shown that God knows all things, comprehends all things, loves, has mercy and justice, is wise intelligent, all-powerful, perfect, immortal and created all things and commands all things.

Pretty much, everything is up to God. Everything depends on GOD. God gives all life, all understanding, all intelligence, all things, and is the only way we can obtain salvation.

God does not make mistakes. God cannot lie (Num 23:19; Titus 1:2; Enos 1:6). God is not a God of confusion (1 Cor 14:33). God would not lead his children away, or tempt them to do that which is wrong and evil. God does not create evil. God does not waver or change, and is the creator of all things good, even all the commandments and the only way to salvation and Eternal life, peace, happiness and joy.

God is our father. We are his children.

If we love God, we will keep ALL his commandments, not just what suits us. We cannot assume that anything God says can be how we want to take it. If God says to do one thing or another or anything it is a commandment, logically speaking.

God also does not force. He has given us "free will", or free agency. He cannot make a good man do that which is bad or good, and cannot make a bad man do that which is bad or good. He cannot stop a murderer from murdering if it has to be stopped by force. God has power over all things BUT OUR WILLS. Our wills are the only thing we have complete control over. It is the ONLY thing we can give God. He cannot take it away. Man may try, the Adversary may try, but God will not try.

This is why bad things happen to good people. God has to allow wicked people to do what they want because he cannot force them otherwise. What they do in this life will be held against them in the next (at Judgement Day). Bad things that people do stand as a witness against them on Judgement Day. And those of us who witness or are victims to another's wicked behavior will stand as witnesses against them as well.

Because God cannot lie he will not teach false doctrine to anyone. He will not tell one man to do one thing and another man to do another. That is contradictory, and that which contradicts is a lying thing by nature.

God knows all things. He has all truth. And only through God can we obtain all truth. God will give it, because he has to in order to save us. AFter all, we cannot be saved in ignorance (Eph 4:18; D&C 131:6), and God knowing this has provided ways and means for us to obtain all that we need in this life to return to Him and live with Him for all Eternity, and with our families. God will not save a man who is willfully ignorant (3 Nephi 6:18). When we know the will and teachings of God and do them not then we are being willfully ignorant, rebelliously ignorant. God will not have mercy on us when we are like this. He would be a liar if he did. He will not save everyone just through his mercies, because there is justice that must be satisfied (Ex 23:7; Prov 17:15; James 2:21). We have to be proven in our works and in our faith, not just our faith in His mercies.

We cannot just live our life in ignorance, willfully disobeying God's commands, and suppose that we will be saved because of our faith in his mercy. That is not how God is or works.

I know what I have shared here to be true. May God's Spirit speak the truth of it to you. I pray you will understand, or want to understand and search these scriptures yourself, pray about it, and believe it.

This is the first and most important thing we all must come to know at some time in our life. And we must live our life in accordance with this knowledge if we wish to be saved in the Kingdom of God forever.